“I see my life as an unfolding set of opportunities to awaken” -Ram Dass
So often we experience our daily lives as swirling, defined by planned activities and crowded agendas. So often our schedules are interrupted by pressing needs and unexpected events, such as a sudden thunderstorm, a flat tire, lost keys, the onset of a cold or a malfunctioning clothes dryer. Days and weeks seem to fly by and we often end up feeling stressed, exhausted and emotionally drained. It is very common for our attention to be drawn to emerging eventsso much so that, by the time we reach the end of our day, we realize that our personal needs have been overlooked, and we muster up enough strength to prepare a quick meal and rest.
These situations are familiar to all of us, and it is natural to ask: what are some of the things that cause these feelings of imbalance, emotional and/or physical discomfort, apathy, fatiguethese overall feelings of stress? These are some common causes:
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- lack of sleep and rest
- financial concerns
- changes in relationships and/or social isolation
- poor nutrition
- loss and/or trauma
- poor personal hygiene
- transitions/lifestyle changes
- illness/changes in functioning
- impending deadlines and time constraints abilities
Each of these situations typically adds stress to our daily lives. The impact of stress can be significant- affecting digestion, heart rate, blood pressure and sleep patterns, and causing head/muscular aches and emotional instability. The importance of taking time to identify, acknowledge and address sources of stress is well known…to take the time to seek support and develop new routines that acknowledge our needs and increase our ability to refresh and renew, to take the time to breathe, center and establish new healing regimens.
So what exactly is self-care? It has been defined as: “The practice of taking action to preserve or improve one’s own health; the practice of taking an active role in protecting one’s own well-being and happiness, particularly during periods of elevated stress.” (Oxford dictionary. Dec 27, 2024). Self-care is also identified as taking steps to do things that help us care for and love ourselves, to affirm and nurture ourselves, and to live well and maintain physical, psychological, emotional, spiritual and social well-being. It is commonly known that even small steps in self-care can significantly improve our sense of energy, our ability to manage stress and function effectively.
Seek support and social connection
One of the first and most important steps to take is to reach out- to a family member, a friend, a wellness and/or medical professional or a community member. It is safe to say that all humans experience stress and it is helpful to remember that we are not alone. Social connections can be helpful in many ways, including experiencing affirmation and emotional support while learning coping techniques
Repeat self-affirmations
Common affirmations: I am worthy; I am loveable; asking for help is an act of self-love; I face my challenges with courage and strength; I am letting go of worry; I have faith and hope; I am valuable; I am grateful for my life’s blessings; I have joy and beauty in my heart; I choose happiness and love; etc. Choose words that affirm you, your strengths and your inner gifts and take time to repeat self-affirmations on a daily basis.
Focus on gratitudes
Take 5-10 minutes each day to list 5-10, or more, things for which you are grateful.
Engage our senses
Take time each day to purposefully focus on your senses. Listening: integrate the presence of music- music that lifts, inspires, motivates or energizes you, or actively sing, hum, vocalize or play an instrument; Sight: use art forms, such as images that inspire relaxation, peace and hope; or dedicate time to read spiritual or inspirational texts, or engage in prayer or meditation; or participate in a creative activity: painting, crocheting, creative writing, sewing, gardening, baking. Also, touch: engaging with pets and spending time in nature can be positively therapeutic.
Journaling
Set aside a few minutes to notate the moments you feel safe, secure, inspired, energized, such as hearing a favorite song, hearing melodious birds or seeing sunrises or sunsets, flowers or autumn leaves, or talking to loved ones. Take time to write about your thoughts, feelings, life experiences, your awarenesses. (Note: journaling serves as a method of helping us acknowledge, affirm, express and gain meaningful insight into ourselves).
Movement
Take time each day to move- to walk, dance, exercise, stretch, practice yoga or other movement techniques, making sure that you incorporate breathing techniques.
Nutrition, Hygiene and Sleep
Ensure that you are practicing healthy nutrition, adequate sleep routines and personal hygiene. Practicing these health-focused routines can improve our cognitive clarity and access to energy, and can also positively affect our moods, our abilities to manage needs and address the demands we encounter.
Mindfulness exercises
Incorporating mindfulness- the practice of becoming self-aware in the present moment- can positively impact our abilities to solve problems and manage stress. Simple mindfulness techniques: intentionally focus on breath; focus on one’s physical sensations; and intentionally identify 1, 2 or 3 things in the moment that you see, hear and feel/touch through one’s senses. Practicing these exercises on a daily basis can reduce anxiety and strengthen ability to preserve inner strength and self-awareness.
Reframing Stress
It is important to note that stress is not always a negative experience. Stress may be and can be a teacher, leading us to make positive modifications and transformations. By altering our perceptions of situations, we can view stress as an opportunity to make changes and create positive plans of action, to see that difficult events may be or are opportunities for transformation, for creating new pathways and embracing new beginnings in our lives.
As part of reframing stress, we can work on developing hardiness– the ability to maintain resilience and inner strength in times of diversity and hardship. Increasing hardiness includes: maintaining commitment (to values, to family, to work); maintaining an inner sense of control over self; and also maintaining the ability to cope with challenges– to perceive change as a challenge. (Kobasa, 1979, Stressful life events, personality and health: An inquiry into hardiness. J Pers Soc Psych). Reframing stress can markedly reduce the difficult impact stress may have on our lives while increasing our abilities to cope, grow and thrive.
Here at Brinkley Brown Mental Wellness we welcome questions and are available to assist you in identifying your unique gifts and qualities- to help you experience improved self-affirmation and self-determination. We offer a compassionate listening presence and a supportive platform to help you learn and practice self-care strategies and find inner peace as you journey along your life’s path!
“You’re off to great places, today is your day.
Your mountain is waiting, so get on your way” Dr. Seuss
“Keep your face always to the sunshine- and shadows will fall behind.” Walt Whitman
(From: Hall, Leah. Country Living. Aug 6, 2025. 40 Positive Attitude Quotes to Motivate and Inspire)
